Escape Artists need really good Life Insurance

A few days ago we had a life insurance guy come to our home to sign us up as responsible adults (something about turning 30 made us realize we aren't kidding around anymore!). As usual when we have other adults come to our house, the boys were alternating between showing off (in this case, leaping off the arms of the couch) and whining for our attention. But, whichever one they were doing, they were constantly in and out and definitely underfoot. As we sat there listening to the agent sell us a rider policy to cover funeral expenses in the sad event that we lose one of our kids, I looked out the window to see our neighbors pull up in their minivan. The door opens and the oldest son leaps out and runs towards the garage. I thought that was strange, but figured they had located a lost pet or something. Moments later the doorbell rings. I answer it to see my neighbor lookng frantic.

Neighbor: "Is Sam okay?"

Me: (terribly confused because Sam is in the room with us) "Yeah, he's fine, why?"

She goes on to explain that as they were driving by they saw a frantically kicking little pair of legs under the door of the garage. Naturally, they assumed that the door had closed on one of our children, which explained the son running from the car like he did. He went to try to lift the door up so they could pull him out. In actuality (sp?), we have been leaving the grage door open about 6 inches for our for our 'fraidy cat when we leave him out all night so he has a place to retreat if he is threatened by one of the millions of feral cats in the neighborhood. As the child lock was temporarily off the inside garage door, he had been jaunting out, shimmying under the (what we thought was way too small) crack under the garage door, tasting a moment of freedom and coming back inside before we were any wiser. Apparently his way back in was more of a squeeze than his way out. When the neighbor ran to "free" him, he came inside as fast as he could and was therefore innocently standing by by the time neighbor made it to the door. I felt like mother of the year...

We now know that children (at least ours) are like little vermin and can squeeze into places you never thought they could or would try. We also now know that this house needs to be like a watertight ship and no door can be left un-child-safety-locked! And most of all, we have learned not to underestimate our children's penchant for getting into trouble.

And yes, we bought the child life insurance. That guy never had such an easy sale!